Domestic and family violence (DFV) is one of the primary causes of homelessness among women and children in Australia. Perhaps of greater concern, 34 women lost their lives at the hands of an intimate partner between 2022-23, which was a 28 percent increase from the prior year. 

This data has not gone unnoticed, with recent government action to increase awareness, support and crisis accommodation for women and their children in Supported Accommodation & Homelessness Services Shoalhaven Illawarra (SAHSSI) Safe Places.

Prevalence in regional communities 

Recent data has shown that DFV impacting women - and subsequently their children - is not only increasing, but more prevalent in regional communities than urban areas. According to the NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics and Research, the DFV assault rate in 2023 was 592.8 incidents for every 100,000 people in regional NSW. This was a significant increase to Sydney, which registered 360 incidents per 100,000 people. 

“Women in regional, rural and remote (RRR) areas are more likely than women in urban areas to experience DFV; with 21 percent in RRR and 15 percent in urban areas,” says Chief Executive Officer at SAHSSI, Penny Dordoy.

This, Dordoy says, may be due to a number of factors. Firstly, the geographical separation limits the amount of social support with others outside of the relationship. Furthermore, seeking help may be more difficult.

“The more rural the community, the more likelihood of police, health professionals and DFV workers knowing both offender and victim. This lack of privacy can inhibit women's willingness to use local services and may also affect the adequacy and fairness of justice-based responses,” says Dordoy. 

“Public visibility of courts in small towns can result in women and their children feeling unsafe and exposed to their perpetrators. Perpetrators have often spent time purposely destroying the woman’s reputation in the community and within services where she may need to reach out for support.”

Social norms and values may also prevent women from reaching out. This may be particularly so within rural communities that consider ‘family problems’ as private affairs not to be discussed, and hold expectations for individuals to be stoic and self-reliant. 

“The fear and threat of community gossip, social stigma and shaming, and the additional consideration of how this will affect children in small communities, can also be used as a coercive tool used by perpetrators,” explains Dordoy.

Furthermore, Dordoy cites other contributing factors, including: complex financial arrangements such as those where money is tied into farms and family businesses, fewer available support and emergency services particularly for those with diverse and specific needs, lacking transport systems, reduced connectivity and digital literacy, perpetrators having greater access to firearms, dominance of rural masculinity, community protection of high-standing perpetrators, and additional stressors such as flood, fire and drought. 

Overall, Dordoy views such issues like a triangle. “The closer you are to the top of the triangle, the more remote you are, the fewer people in your community, the higher the barriers and the less opportunity to escape DFV safely. If you are in a city, at the bottom section of the triangle, the more services, opportunities, places to seek help, financial assistance or ability to rent or achieve secure housing, and choice,” she explains. 

Understanding various forms of domestic violence

The broader definition of DFV may not be well-understood by the general public and is often littered with misconceptions. General Manager of Women Illawarra Inc., Michelle Glasgow, reiterates that DFV may take various forms, and in many instances does not involve physical violence.

“Domestic abuse is about the perpetrator exercising power and control over the victim. In my experience, it usually starts with emotional and psychological abuse, such as name calling, public humiliation, undermining and gaslighting, threats to leave, withdrawing of affection or attention, stonewalling. It is designed to undermine the victim’s confidence, socially isolate them and make them dependent on the perpetrator’s approval.” 

“I liken it to a systematic process of creating a brain fog that keeps you in the dark, unable to see clearly as the rules and behaviours are unpredictable and ever-changing,” she explains. 

“The other forms of abuse that are not physical are religious, financial and abuse of pets in some instances. Coercive control is a little more subtle. It is a pattern of behaviours that in isolation look innocuous. However, they are repeated over time and have the effect of removing the autonomy of the victim in their life.”

Glasgow paints a painful picture of how someone experiencing DFV may feel like they are constantly walking on eggshells, unsure of how someone will respond, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. From the outside looking in, it may be hard to detect. However, it is a relentlessly terrifying and exhausting existence for the target. 

Providing new Safe Places 

Naturally, increased cases means increased need for support. Unfortunately, the system is drastically under pressure. Whilst Women Illawarra Inc. are able to support with advocacy letters to housing providers to advocate for women fleeing DFV, Glasgow admits that the Staying Home Leaving Violence program in the Illawarra has been at capacity for a significant period of time, and hence a primary service that cannot currently be utilised.

Acknowledging this critical need for support amid the current housing crisis, Federal Member for Gilmore, Fiona Phillips, recently announced the opening of a new Safe Places facility in Ulladulla to provide emergency accommodation for women and children experiencing DFV in the Southern Shoalhaven. 

The Safe Places Emergency Accommodation Program is funded by the Albanese Labor Government, which, thanks to an investment of $72.6 million, financed the renovation, building or purchase of new crisis or emergency accommodation. The program has enabled 32 SAHSSI Safe Places sites to open across the region, providing support for up to 256 women and children experiencing DFV each year. Most recently, the Southern Cross Community Housing Safe Places site in Ulladulla opened its doors last February. The facility’s six studio apartments will provide assistance to up to 24 women and children. 

Federal Minister for Social Services, Amanda Rishworth, recently visited the Illawarra Safe Places sites. “Women and children face significant challenges when leaving family and domestic violence,” said Minister Rishworth.

“These new Safe Places sites will assist more women and children experiencing DFV, by ensuring they have a safe place to go and can access necessary specialist services. Our government remains determined to tackle the scourge of family, domestic and sexual violence. It’s simply unacceptable.”

Phillips recently accompanied Minister Rishworth for a tour of the newly opened Ulladulla facility. “Visiting the new Safe Places emergency accommodation gave me an opportunity to meet the women and children who have experienced family and domestic violence, and to hear their harrowing personal stories first hand,” said Phillips.

“It was great to speak with the wonderful frontline workers, who are helping these women and children by providing a safe haven for them, and also providing the absolutely vital support they need to move forward.”

Federal Minister for Social Services Amanda Rishworth and Federal Member for Gilmore Fiona Phillips visiting the new Safe Place in Ulladulla.

More information on the Safe Places program is available through the Department of Social Services’ website.

Speaking up and seeking help

Phillips reiterates that, “one life lost to violence against women is too many, and deaths of women at the hands of men who profess to love and care for them has to end".

It can be confusing trying to clearly ascertain the state of a relationship, particularly one in which a degree of coercive control has been enforced. If you are unsure, Glasgow urges reaching out to a trusted friend, colleague, family member or support worker and starting a conversation. 

“There are some incredible online supports like 1800-RESPECT that can provide 24-hour counselling and information. The first step is always having a chat,” she urges.

Women Illawarra also welcome contributions from volunteers, who feel the call to support women and children who have experienced DFV. Potential volunteers can register their interest via the Women Illawarra website: www.womenillawarra.org.au. They will also be at Wollongong City Council’s Volunteer Expo on 22 May and hosting a community gathering at Lang Park, Wollongong on 25 May at 12:30pm, calling for action to change the Illawarra culture towards violence against women.

If you or someone you know may be at risk in a DFV situation, please seek support from organisations such as Women Illawarra, SAHSSI and 1800-RESPECT. Contact police on 000 in the event of immediate danger.